Five signs of the Apocalypse

From the Facebook folklore:

Uncle Mullah, is it a sin or a good thing to buy the dollars?
Bismillah-ir-rəhman-ir-rəhim. Of course, it’s a sin, my son. Besides, it’s the most grievous one, since dollars are issued by Masons in order to weaken the Muslims. By the way, as far as the dollars are concerned, are they still sold in banks or not?

1. The first and the main sign of the upcoming devaluation is the Central Bank’s statement that there will be no any devaluation. It already happened. On August 22, the Central Bank claimed that the ‘rumors about alleged devaluation are groundless‘.

2. The banks stop selling foreign currency. And that’s already evident: none of the banks have been issuing more than US$100 ‘per man’ since mid-August.

3. The prices are creeping upward. It all probably started with electricity prices. Then the foodstuffs gradually caught up, followed by the cloths and the building materials.

4. Cafés are deserted. It’s not that people no longer can afford eating out, simply before anothere plummeting of the Manat exchange rate (and immediately upon it) the Azeris instinctively start spending less in the fear of ‘stretching their arms further than their sleeves will reach’.

5. Folklore on social media. It’s already the third devaluation since December 2015. First time everyone was in panic, the second time they exercised their wits, whereas this time some of them even burst into writing poems.

Published: 06.09.2016